When You Find Your First Love Again, Here Is What Changes

Introduction

This Sunday, December 7, 2025, at ICC Montreal, assistant pastor Romaric WARE preached a message that the Spirit had laid on his heart while the fathers were preaching on first love and covetousness, from Revelation. He did not hesitate to change his title and put it simply: "When you find your first love again, here is what changes."

Why this title? Because finding your first love again is not just an invisible inner movement. It produces signs. As Jesus said in Mark, "these signs will accompany those who believe." And as Nicodemus admitted before Jesus: "No one can do these things that you do unless God is with him." When you are truly living in first love, there are unmistakable marks. These are the marks the preacher invites you to examine before God.

Outline of the Message

1. You Cannot Love God on Your Own

This is the first truth, and it may shock you: you cannot love God by your own ability. Love for God is born out of discovering God's love for you. Without that discovery, you will wear yourself out trying to love a God you have never experienced.

Look at Matthew 3. Jesus goes to John the Baptist to be baptized. John the Baptist refuses at first: "In my position, I cannot baptize you." And Jesus replies: "It is fitting for us to do this." Simple obedience. No long discussion, no drama. It matters that you learn to do what God wants you to do, not what you feel like doing.

The result: when Jesus comes out of the water, the heavens open. Not because someone fasted, spoke in tongues, or prayed for hours. The heavens opened because someone obeyed. When you decide to go to the John the Baptist God has given you, there is always a heaven that opens. The more you resist, the longer heaven takes to open.

2. "This Is My Beloved Son": The One Thing to Remember

Matthew 3:17: "A voice from heaven said, 'This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.'"

Beloved, pause here. Jesus is about to begin his ministry. At such a crucial moment, the Father does not tell him: "You will be a great prophet. Here is how you will suffer. Here are the strategies. Here is the order of things." No. The only thing God tells him is: I love you, and I have placed all my affection in you. Not part of it, all of it.

That is the one thing Jesus operated on for three and a half years. With every opposition, every Pharisee who attacked him, every crisis, the one thing that carried Jesus was remembering that God loves him. Not remembering that he is a great prophet. Not remembering that he would rise again. Remembering that God loves him.

The problem is that you are too aware of your mission, and not aware enough of God's love for you. You are more conscious of what God asks you to do than of the love God has for you. John 3:16 says: "God so loved the world that he gave." He did not just love. He so loved. The moment you discover this love, you become different. No one will need to beg you to love God anymore, it will be natural.

3. Peter Said He Loved Jesus, John Knew Jesus Loved Him

At the end of Jesus' life, two men illustrate this.

Peter boasted about loving Jesus. He said it loudly. He swore he would die for him. But at the cross, where was he? Hiding.

John, on the other hand, is called "the disciple whom Jesus loved." It is not John insisting on his love for Jesus; it is John insisting on Jesus' love for him. And at the cross, he is there, standing, before the Lord.

The lesson hits you: the one who is more aware of God's love for them holds on more firmly than the one who thinks they love God by their own strength. They stand firm despite trials. They can stop, remember where God pulled them out of, and remain secure.

Many have lost their love for God because they were frustrated by trials. They forgot that God loves them. They simply forgot.

4. The Devil's Strategy: Remove the Word "Beloved"

Matthew 4. Jesus, right after being baptized, is led into the wilderness to be tempted. Notice how the devil approaches him: "If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become bread." A second time: "If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down."

Do you notice something? The devil removed "beloved." He left "Son of God," your identity, your ability, your mission. But he took out "beloved." He was trying to make Jesus think: "If you accept that the most important thing is being the Son of God, you will see that things will happen."

Jesus understood the trap. "I am the Son of God, yes. But I am first of all beloved." If the devil fights to make Jesus forget that word, how much more will he fight to make you forget it? This is why so many Christian lives slide into spiritual self-help: "You can make it, you are a son of God, you have the ability." But when you remove the love of God that was placed on you first, you change the order, and you will run out of breath.

Those who lean 100 percent on the Lord in trials are the ones who know he loves them, that he has plans for their good and not for their harm, no matter what happens.

5. The Preacher's Testimony: Looking for Power, Finding Love

Romaric WARE shares his story: when he was 12 or 13 years old, his father died. What brought him out of mourning was God telling him that he loved him. It is one thing to read it. It is another to hear the Spirit of God confirm it inside you.

Before that, he had not come to God for his love. He was looking for power. His father, a doctor, had dabbled with fetishes. One day he heard his father's car horn honking. He went outside: no one there, but the car was running, and voices could be heard. His father told him: "That's your grandfather coming to visit us." The household was marked by these manifestations, and by alcohol as well. The young boy wanted power in order to understand it and to stop it.

It was his mother who, invited to church, came back transformed. He went with her. The pastor got up and said: "God spoke to me today." The pastor began telling his own story. And right there, everything shifted. The young man had been looking for power; he found more than power: love. And that love changed his life.

6. Martha Welcomes Jesus, Mary Sits at His Feet (Luke 10:38-42)

Martha welcomes Jesus into her home. She is the one who invites him in. But it is Mary who sits at Jesus' feet. There are moments when you invite Jesus into a place, you call people to worship him, but you yourself are stuck in the flesh, busy with all sorts of household chores.

Martha came up to him and said: "Lord, does it not concern you that my sister has left me to serve alone?" Notice her tone: she comes rushing up. There is aggression in it. She forgets she is speaking to Jesus. When the fear of God goes down, the way you speak to him changes.

Jesus answers her gently but firmly: "Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things. One thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion."

One thing is necessary. Relationship before service. Relationship before productivity. Yes to performance, yes to excellence, yes to productivity, but love first.

7. Lazarus Was at the Table; Mary Was at His Feet (John 12:1-9)

Six days before Passover, Jesus returns to Bethany. Martha is still serving. She has not yet learned the lesson. But another figure appears: Lazarus, raised from the dead, was reclining at the table with Jesus.

The miracle God has done in your life brought you back into the house. That is a good thing. But once you are back, keep deepening the relationship. The crowd comes to Bethany "not only on account of Jesus, but also to see Lazarus, whom he had raised from the dead." We do not know whether Lazarus is there to honor Jesus or to be seen. But one thing is clear: he placed himself as an equal, at the table, and not at Jesus' feet.

Beloved, those who have found and kept their first love feel uncomfortable putting themselves on equal footing with God. They stay low.

And Mary, she takes a pound of pure nard, of great value, anoints Jesus' feet, and wipes them with her hair. She no longer settles for just being at his feet: she throws herself down. "I have understood that you are my everything. What Martha told me last time, I let it go." She has understood what God wants in this season. The revelation she received before anyone else (that Jesus had to be anointed for his burial) came in the secret place, in the depth of the relationship.

8. When Love Drops, the Fear of God Drops, and You Do Things You Would Never Have Done

A point not to miss: those who have found their first love again carry a visible fear of God in their lives. Even when they do not understand, they know there are things they cannot allow themselves to say to God.

But when you are angry at God (because the marriage is taking too long, because the promise is taking too long), the fear of God drops. Your language becomes harsh. You stop your times of worship, your hour of adoration, your retreats. You end up in places you never wanted to be. The preacher tells of a sister who came to him and said: "I have sinned. God did not give me this, my ex left me, I went out and gave myself to the first man who came along." She had forgotten that he loves her.

God is your Father, but if you are not careful, you can get struck by the stepfather. His fear is the thread that holds you in place when emotion wants to make you fall.

9. The Trap of Being a Christian by Profession Rather Than by Identity

The Spirit of God made the preacher understand that it is possible to become a Christian by profession and not a Christian by identity. You can sanctify yourself not because you love God, but because you want to build yourself an image, a trophy to show off: "I am a virgin," "I go to church," "I do this for God."

The question he puts to you directly:

• Do you sanctify yourself because you love him, or because you have conformed?
• Do you do it because you love him, or because you grew up in an environment that taught you to do it?
• Do you serve in this place because you love him, or because you dream of holding the microphone one day?

Matthew 22:37: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength." That is the first and greatest commandment. Luke 4:8: "You shall worship the Lord your God, and him only shall you serve." After loving him, you worship him, then you serve him. When service comes before love, it becomes religion instead of relationship.

10. The Ingratitude Hiding Behind Forgetting

There is something subtle that steals God's place in your life: ingratitude. You forget where he pulled you out of. Some fasted and prayed to reach the country they now live in. He blessed them, lifted them up, and he has been pushed down to the very last place in their lives.

You used to walk the alleys of your old neighborhood; today you drive an air conditioned car, and you have forgotten the God who met you there. That is ingratitude.

And when things go wrong, you point fingers: "It's because of dad, of mom, of my ex, of the pastor, of the leader." But God has set principles and laws in place, like a judge who simply applies the law. The thief standing before the judge is not the judge's victim. When you break a biblical principle, you suffer the consequence tied to dishonoring that law. It has nothing to do with God, and yet you say he does not love you.

11. Your Mission Must Flow From His Love

"Father, we have grown too attached to our comfort, too attached to our mission. We have proclaimed that we are wonders, but we have forgotten that you began with love. You walked in love. You ended in love. We put other things first."

Your mission must flow from the love of God within you. Your service must flow from the love of God. 1 Samuel 10:6: "The Spirit of the Lord will rush upon you, and you will prophesy with them, and you will be turned into another man." Another man. Another woman.

It is possible to love him, but loving him without him is impossible. On your own strength, you cannot love a God who is infinitely great. That is why the fathers cry out endlessly: "Grant us the grace to love you." That is why Ezekiel 36:26 promises: "I will give you a new heart."

Key Takeaways

1. You cannot love God on your own. You will only love him once you discover and accept his love for you (Matthew 3:17).
2. "Beloved" comes before "Son of God." The devil always tries to make you forget that you are loved, in order to reduce you to your mission and your abilities alone (Matthew 4:3-6).
3. The one who knows they are loved holds firm. John stood before the cross, Peter was hiding. Awareness of God's love produces steadfastness (John 13:23; Matthew 26:69-75).
4. Relationship before service. Mary chose the good portion; Martha was anxious and troubled. One thing is necessary (Luke 10:38-42).
5. Do not place yourself as God's equal. Lazarus was at the table, Mary at his feet. The miracle brought you back into the house, stay low and deepen the relationship (John 12:1-9).
6. Be a Christian by identity, not by profession. Service, worship, and sanctification only have value if they flow from love (Matthew 22:37; Luke 4:8).
7. Fight ingratitude and remember. Remember where God pulled you from, and put him back in first place.

Personal Application

1. Before God, answer honestly: am I more aware of my mission or of God's love for me?
2. Can I say of myself, "I am God's beloved," not just in theory, but as something I experience inside?
3. Where does my fear of God stand? Has the way I speak to him changed since certain trials did not resolve the way I wanted?
4. Am I serving, sanctifying myself, holding on because I love him, or for a "trophy" to show off (a facade, an image, a status)?
5. Is there hidden ingratitude? Take a moment to remember concretely where God pulled you from this year, over the last five years, over the last ten years.
6. What Mary did (throwing herself at his feet, anointing him, wiping his feet with her hair): where does my own worship stand at that level today?

Verses Cited

• Matthew 3:13-17, The baptism of Jesus, the heavens open, the Father's voice: "This is my beloved Son."
• Matthew 4:1-11, The temptation in the wilderness: "If you are the Son of God..."
• Matthew 22:37, The first and greatest commandment.
• Luke 4:8, "You shall worship the Lord your God, and him only shall you serve."
• Luke 10:38-42, Martha and Mary: the good portion.
• John 3:16, "God so loved the world that he gave."
• John 12:1-9, Mary anoints Jesus' feet; Lazarus at the table.
• Mark 16:17, The signs that accompany those who have believed.
• John 3:2, Nicodemus: "No one can do these things that you do unless God is with him."
• 1 Samuel 10:6, "You will be turned into another man."
• Ezekiel 36:26, "I will give you a new heart."
• Revelation 2:4-5, "You have abandoned your first love... remember, repent."

FAQ

What does "finding your first love again" mean according to this message?

It is not simply reviving a past emotion, nor doubling down on Christian activity. It is rediscovering and re-experiencing God's love for you, just as the Father affirmed it over Jesus at his baptism: "This is my beloved Son." Without that rediscovery, love for God fades and service becomes religion.

Why does Romaric WARE place so much emphasis on the word "beloved"?

Because in Matthew 4, the devil removes exactly that word in his temptations: he says "If you are the Son of God," but drops "beloved." The preacher explains that Satan always tries to make you live out your mission and identity without the foundation of the Father's love. When you lose "beloved," you run out of breath and become vulnerable to discouragement and to spiritual self-help thinking.

How do I know if I am a "Christian by profession" rather than "by identity"?

Ask yourself the questions from the message: do you sanctify yourself, serve, go to church because you love God, or because you have conformed to an environment, a family, an image? If your commitments are trophies to show off rather than expressions of love, you are in the realm of profession. Returning to your first love means letting love become the source of everything else again.